hahahah ain't so black metal when your mommy's up on the stand defending ya, are ya Gaahl? Maybe he outta look into joining up with the Wiggles now!

"..Belphegor, I should note, has been credited with assuring regular bowel movements, so perhaps he might have a lasting effect on constipated mages."

Pffft. I shiver to think of what he's going to do with his mother, when he gets out, to get back at her for not being tr00 and kvlt. Poor woman...

"You've got this real living, breathing person, who's now dead." - Rob Halford

ORIGINAL: Godzilla

hahahah ain't so black metal when your mommy's up on the stand defending ya, are ya Gaahl? Maybe he outta look into joining up with the Wiggles now!

Wiggles, eh? Do you think he is a good fit?



EDIT: Wiggles is the Tr00est of the tr00!

AHAHAHA!!! OMG this will traumatize so many kids... Kirsten loves it!

"..Belphegor, I should note, has been credited with assuring regular bowel movements, so perhaps he might have a lasting effect on constipated mages."

Bwahhahhahahah!!

______________________________

"<MikePortnoyFan> we loev dteam theatre here in peru!" <-- Undercover DrumRman

It was during intense questioning by prosecutors that details regarding Gaahl's past became evident:







Alex: "Okay Final Jeopardy category is" (whoomp)







Alex: "Okay Gaahl, final question" (whoomp)








Gaahl: (guttural exhale) "AAAAAGH...who are Ray,...Roy,


Robbi....


ugghh Rosa




.....aaagh Raymond


(DING)
Alex: "Correct, you have just doubled your money to $1600...alas not enough. Thanks for playing!




Gaahl: "aaaaghh"

"Music is just a release of all that stuff inside that's trying to kill you. I think just — life is so difficult. The thing I love about music is that you can take painful, deep things that hurt, and turn them into something beautiful." ~ Ray LaMontagne

ROFL!

Not to be picky, whiskeyjack, but you WRITE the 'questions' of final jeopardy... you don't grunt them :)


Even so, HILARIOUS.

Well dirk did it, i thought i'd host mine too. We both made the same graphic for Godzirra, cept dirk has photoshop and i only have paint. Which of course makes mine PWN.

Whos the dumass sos you drawres bicth! Cause good teams win it not bugsnot.Heres you tubfart no the great coach! No lie dogs beat it!!

http://denimdouche.blogspot.com
Read what HawaiianRyan has to say about the world.

ORIGINAL: Dirk Smithsonian

Not to be picky, whiskeyjack, but you WRITE the 'questions' of final jeopardy... you don't grunt them :)


Even so, HILARIOUS.

Yeah, I just realized it 5.1 minutes later, couldn't change it. I left out afterwards when Gaahl takes a chunk out of Bill's neck after Bill makes a flippant remark about the odor to his left.

"Music is just a release of all that stuff inside that's trying to kill you. I think just — life is so difficult. The thing I love about music is that you can take painful, deep things that hurt, and turn them into something beautiful." ~ Ray LaMontagne

ROTFLOL!!!!!

"..Belphegor, I should note, has been credited with assuring regular bowel movements, so perhaps he might have a lasting effect on constipated mages."

These pics RULE!!!

I CANNOT STOP LAUGHING MY FUCKING ASS OFF HERE!!!!!!!!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

So freaking great, gang... seriously... OUTSTANDING!!

hahahahaha, stupid black metal jerks. i mean, cammon, they take that shit seriously? do they think they are/look cool like that??

Gaahl (or whatever) is such a dumb ass... "im going to sacrifice you, then drink your blood." man....

as for the sheep heads and what not... so the sheep heads are real, but i dont think they would/could get their hands on so much sheep blood. i think its just movie blood. as for the naked crucified peaople... well, its only offensive if you beleive in that religion <--- not trying to create argument, just making a point. like some guy said in this thread before, its all just theatrics... and if it isnt, then, well, maybe jail is a good thing for retards that think and act like that.

I get a kick outa this kinda stuff. its funny to see how far people will go to try and be 'evil' and 'scary'... that 'satanic' shit was so 1980's when people cared. anybody remember the contoversy over slayer and bands like that?? they arnt gettin any problems anymore cuz that isnt 'cool' anymore... whats """"cool"""" is bling bling, hot women and crapy luxory cars.

its a shame tho, cuz drummers in the black metal bands can sure fly on those pedals

I thought music took some sort of skill... Thanks to creed, that has been proven wrong.

I dunno man, that satanic stuff is scary.

http://www.myspace.com/elusivesolution
"Prog-rock is all about geeks writing computer programs to settle the Neil Peart vs. Mike Portnoy debate."
- Dr. David Thorpe

ORIGINAL: Slaggg
that 'satanic' shit was so 1980's when people cared. anybody remember the contoversy over slayer and bands like that??

I've been reading parts from Mikal Gilmore's Night Beat and in the heavy metal section there is a part involving Slayer's tour with Megadeth and Anthrax:

---Jeff Hanneman, one of Slayer's lead guitarists ( and the author of "Angel of Death" --the song that got the band thrown off CBS Records), doesn't think so. "Obviously," he says, "a lot of our fans do identify with evil--or at least they think they do. But the truth is, when you come across one of the most hardcore Slayer fans--one of these guys going Sa-tan! Sa-tan! Sa-tan!--and you say, 'Now calm down, dude; do you really believe in Satan?' he might go, 'Yes! Sa-tan! And then you go, 'No, no--do you really believe in Satan?' he'll go, 'Uh, well, no not really.' You know, to him it's cool because it's evil, and evil is rebellion.

"Music is just a release of all that stuff inside that's trying to kill you. I think just — life is so difficult. The thing I love about music is that you can take painful, deep things that hurt, and turn them into something beautiful." ~ Ray LaMontagne

Stop dissing black metal just because you don't understand it. Listen to some of the music before bashing it. A lot of these guys aren't as evil as they portray, but black metal is a tradition in Norwegian countries and the whole image is just something that's been going on for a long time. Most black metal kicks a lot of ass. Lot of good musicians to be heard.

no good musicianship in real black metal! death to pixie progheads and their good musicians!

sorry, had to put in the obligatory line :) can't disappoint.

ORIGINAL: Big Suave

Awesome.

GAAHL's Mother Defends GORGOROTH Singer Against Blood-Drinking Charges: 'My Son's A Vegetarian' - Apr. 28, 2004

GORGOROTH singer Gaahl is facing 18 months in a Norwegian prison on charges that he beat a 41-year-old man in what the victim called a ritual attack. The 28-year-old had originally faced up to nine years for threats and violence, but the prosecution asked for a much shorter sentence at the close of a two-day trial on Wednesday (April 28).

Gaahl, who appeared in court wearing a black GORGOROTH t-shirt, a leather jacket and a Thor's Hammer necklace, is accused of performing ritual violence that included collecting blood from his victim and drinking it, newspaper VG reports. The victim, whose identity hasn't been revealed, has been on sick leave for over two years since the February 2002 attack.

According to the charges, the 41-year-old was hit and kicked several times in the face and head and needed stitches to close cuts in his head. His nose was broken and he suffered major dental damage, newspaper Aftenposten reports.

Gaahl, who has several prior convictions including one for assault and battery, claimed that he acted in self-defense.

Taking the stand in her son's defense, Gaahl's mother testified that she found the accusation of blood drinking particularly hard to believe.

"My son is a vegetarian and very fussy about food. He eats absolutely no innards. That is why I do not believe this at all," Gaahl's mother told the court.

Formed in 1992, GORGOROTH took their name from J.R.R. Tolkien's book "The Lord Of The Rings". Gaahl, who joined the band in 1998, is believed to be involved with at least three other projects (GAAHLSKAGG, SIGFADER, TRELLDOM), all of which feature a musical direction described as "raw, unsophisticated black metal."

GORGOROTH drew international attention in early February after they were accused of "offending religious feelings" during a concert in Poland. The band were also suspected of breaching the Polish law on protection of animals by displaying the severed and impaled heads of sheep as part of their stage act.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I'm pseudo-veggie (occasional burgers and boneless chicken only) and butcher shops and severed lamb heads make me queasy.

Well, wait. I enjoy milk sometimes, as many vegetarians also do. So could you technically be a vegetarian and still [enjoy] the occasional glass of blood?

(Not that I'm asking permission, but her defense is kinda NOT the same thing, right?)

There are so many incredibily stupid people that are allowed to call themself or their music "black metal". Don't care about them. I had never heard of them before this sheep-thing in Poland. BTW , where did you all find norwegian news in english on the internet?
Here where I live, a local band got banned from the musical scene because one of their members was wearing a BURZUM t-shirt. Burzum is the former band of Varg Vikernes, who was known for burning down about 10 churches in Norway in the early 90's and for killing one of the members in Mayhem.

GORGOROTH Singer Sentenced To 18 Months In Prison - May 4, 2004

GORGOROTH singer Gaahl was sentenced Tuesday (May 4) to 18 months in a Norwegian prison on charges that he beat a 41-year-old man in what the victim called a ritual attack.

The 28-year-old black metal vocalist, who has several prior convictions including one for assault and battery, was sentenced at Sunnfjord court in Forde, Norway. In addition to the prison term, Gaahl was ordered to pay 75,000 NOK (approximately $11,000) to the victim, plus an additional 29,000 NOK (approximately $4,300) in damages.

The court's sentence matched the recommendation from prosecutor Ronny Iden, who took into account the fact that Gaahl had a prior conviction for assault. In that 2001 incident, Gaahl brutalized his victim for hours and was sentenced to one year in prison without the possibility of parole. In addition, he was ordered to pay 158,000 NOK (approximately $23,000) in punitive damages. "Two people have had their lives irreparably shattered by the defendant's actions," the court said in the written sentence.

Gaahl, who appeared in court wearing a black GORGOROTH t-shirt, a leather jacket and a Thor's Hammer necklace, was accused of performing ritual violence that included collecting blood from his victim and drinking it. The victim, whose identity hasn't been revealed, was hit and kicked several times in the face and head and needed stitches to close cuts in his head. His nose was broken and he suffered major dental damage.

Formed in 1992, GORGOROTH took their name from J.R.R. Tolkien's book "The Lord Of The Rings". Gaahl, who joined the band in 1998, is believed to be involved with at least three other projects (GAAHLSKAGG, SIGFADER, TRELLDOM), all of which feature a musical direction described as "raw, unsophisticated black metal."

GORGOROTH drew international attention in early February after they were accused of "offending religious feelings" during a concert in Poland. The band were also suspected of breaching the Polish law on protection of animals by displaying the severed and impaled heads of sheep as part of their stage act.

cool. this moron got a bit of what he deserved.

18 months?? hahahah what a puss punishment. They should send him to American prison, where he will get 3 square meals a day, all the daytime tv and computertime he could ever want, hot prison tattoos, and quite possibly an education! Torture I tell ya!

What are Norwegian prisons like, anyway?

"..Belphegor, I should note, has been credited with assuring regular bowel movements, so perhaps he might have a lasting effect on constipated mages."

even more pussified.

he should be executed for committing the ultimate sin: wearing his own band's shirt!

ORIGINAL: Godzilla

18 months?? hahahah what a puss punishment. They should send him to American prison, where he will get 3 square meals a day, all the daytime tv and computertime he could ever want, hot prison tattoos, and quite possibly an education! Torture I tell ya!

What are Norwegian prisons like, anyway?

Like the gardens of Eden only without God and with cable-tv!

Ew. I'm throwing away all my Gorgoroth albums and my signed collector's edition official Gorgoroth sheep spleen is going on ebay.

Whos the dumass sos you drawres bicth! Cause good teams win it not bugsnot.Heres you tubfart no the great coach! No lie dogs beat it!!

http://denimdouche.blogspot.com
Read what HawaiianRyan has to say about the world.

Burzum is the former band of Varg Vikernes, who was known for burning down about 10 churches in Norway in the early 90's and for killing one of the members in Mayhem.

Wasn't there a book written about this guy? I've been looking for it

Norwegian prisons are weak. Shit, Varg has been releasing synthesizer albums from prison for more than 5 years. Amazingly, many consider these albums to be moody, dark, masterpieces. Probably are.

ORIGINAL: MetalDestruction

Norwegian prisons are weak. Shit, Varg has been releasing synthesizer albums from prison for more than 5 years. Amazingly, many consider these albums to be moody, dark, masterpieces. Probably are.

Eh... no on both accounts. Those two albums were released between 1997 and 1999. And they're both atrocious. I refer to them as the Wesley Willis of ambient.

ORIGINAL: Big Suave

Wey?

"I just took a shower in my air-conditioned trailer. Jealous?"
-Maynard James Keenan to 40,000 smelly hippies at Bonaroo

LOL!

When the un-numbered free emo man sees he goes *fapfapfap* because he thinks it's so yummy!

Erm. No

[image]local://upfiles/615/6F9BA0D8D07A457DA7D1702756BBEC00.jpg[/image]

Attached Image(s)

Twins!

I kid. I kid because I love.

"I just took a shower in my air-conditioned trailer. Jealous?"
-Maynard James Keenan to 40,000 smelly hippies at Bonaroo

OMG!!!WTF!!! GAAHL IS OUR MODURATERZ!!!1`11

Best I got is parakeet blood, WeyGaahl. Sorry man... I tried.

"..Belphegor, I should note, has been credited with assuring regular bowel movements, so perhaps he might have a lasting effect on constipated mages."

YES!! The Gorgoroth concert that started this whole glorious thread is #45 on VH1's list of the Most Metal Moments!!!

I saw it tonight, and I almost fell out of my chair!! Freaking awesome.

No mention on VH1 of Gahl's post-concert legal woes, however.

Damn I missed it. I'm just gonna have to catch it one of the other 200 or so times they air it this month.

i hate metal bands that out on these ridiculous shows, with all kinds of blood and stuff, and have dead animal corpses everywhere. Why not take your time to make the MUSIC good, and worry about the flashy stuff after. just my opinion.

GORGOROTH singer Gaahl is hoping to overturn the 18-month sentence he received in early May for beating a 41-year-old man in what the victim called a ritual attack. "Gaahl has appealed the sentence to the High Court — criminal division, but as these things take a long time here in Norway, nothing has happened yet," reads a posting on the band's web site.

The 28-year-old black metal vocalist, who has several prior convictions including one for assault and battery, was sentenced at Sunnfjord court in Forde, Norway. In addition to the prison term, Gaahl was ordered to pay 75,000 NOK (approximately $11,000) to the victim, plus an additional 29,000 NOK (approximately $4,300) in damages.

The court's sentence matched the recommendation from prosecutor Ronny Iden, who took into account the fact that Gaahl had a prior conviction for assault. In that 2001 incident, Gaahl brutalized his victim for hours and was sentenced to one year in prison without the possibility of parole. In addition, he was ordered to pay 158,000 NOK (approximately $23,000) in punitive damages. "Two people have had their lives irreparably shattered by the defendant's actions," the court said in the written sentence.

Gaahl is one of the musicians tentatively scheduled to perform a selection of classic BATHORY songs during Norway's Hole In The Sky Festival in late August as a tribute to the group's mastermind Thomas "Quorthon" Forsberg, who passed away earlier this month.

GORGOROTH drew international attention in early February after they were accused of "offending religious feelings" during a concert in Poland. The band were also suspected of breaching the Polish law on protection of animals by displaying the severed and impaled heads of sheep as part of their stage act.

LLAMA!! Can't let this thread disappear. GAAHL would not be pleased.

Jesus H Christ!!!!!!!!!
Damn It Wey, that's one scary mutha fuckin pic
Screw this fear the wookie shit, I'm getting a cross, some grains of sand, a wooden stake, and a big fucking batch of garlic!

I'd hit it and leave it for dead!